Most problems in a relationship are caused by an absence or bad communication. The ways you choose to interact with your partner will strengthen the foundation of your relationship. Here are some tips on how to communicate properly with your partner.
Be an active listener
There is a HUGE difference between a passive listener and an active listener. Being a passive listener means simply sitting there and being in a daze: you don’t give any feedback, you do not take ‘’mental notes’’ or seem like you are absorbing any information. You are only there physically. However, when you are an active listener, you give feedback, you give her your full attention, you make eye contact and you take the time to be there for her and listen to all of the details.
Pay attention to her nonverbal communication
As mentioned previously in another post, there are many things you can understand through body language.
Speak with the “I” or “We”, avoid the “You”
Often, when we explain how we feel to our partner, we tend to use the “you” which makes it sounds like you are accusing the other person or that you presume how the other one feels. When you want to bring up something that is bothering you, whether the other is at fault or not, express yourself with the “I statement”. That way, you can share your feelings/point of you and then ask for hers. By using the “we statement”, you acknowledge that you are a union and that you wish to work together (as a team) to resolve the issue or the conflict.
Show that you care
While she is expressing herself, make eye contact, reassure her, touch her arm or her hair to show her that you are there to listen to her. If it is more of a heated discussion, just let her speak without interrupting her. Although some men might have to swallow their pride in some discussions, remember it is not about winning an argument, but solving the issue.
If you have been dealing with an ongoing situation in your relationship and you have not been able to solve it, the next step would be counseling, where a professional can guide you through the communication process.